Please Stop Giving Unsolicited Form Advice as a Flirting Technique

To the man who interrupted my set yesterday to tell me my squat depth was "a little shallow":

Sir. My squat depth is fine. My squat depth has been fine for the four years I've been training. My squat depth was fine when it was assessed by an actual coach who I pay actual money. You know what's shallow? Your excuse for starting a conversation.

Look, I get it. The gym is a weird social environment. You see someone attractive, you want to talk to them, but there's no natural opening. Everyone's got headphones in. Nobody's making eye contact. So you think, "I know! I'll offer some helpful advice! That's not creepy, that's helpful!"

It is creepy. It is always creepy.

Here is a non-exhaustive list of "form corrections" I have received from people who were transparently just trying to flirt:

• "You should widen your grip on bench." (My grip is fine. My bench is 1.2x bodyweight. Please leave.)
• "Try pointing your toes out more on squats." (They were already pointed out.)
• "You're going to hurt your back doing deadlifts like that." (I was doing Romanian deadlifts. That's... what they look like.)
• "Have you tried using a belt?" (Have you tried using a conversation starter that doesn't imply I don't know what I'm doing?)

The thing is, if someone actually wants advice, they'll ask for it. They'll look confused. They'll watch other people doing the same exercise. They'll approach YOU. That's the signal.

You know what's actually attractive at the gym? Minding your own business. Wiping down your equipment. Reracking your weights. Being generally respectful of shared space. THAT is the energy that makes people think "hmm, I'd like to know that person."

If you genuinely want to meet someone at the gym, there are way better approaches. This guide on gym flirting signs actually breaks it down really well — read the room, look for mutual interest, and for the love of all things holy, don't interrupt someone mid-set.

And if you absolutely must talk to someone, try this revolutionary technique: wait until they're between sets, make eye contact, and say "hey." That's it. Just "hey." No critique of their form. No assessment of their programming. Just a normal human greeting.

I promise it works better than "your elbows are flaring."

Related: Is It Weird to Approach Someone at the Gym? — spoiler: it's not weird if you do it like a normal person. It IS weird if you open with biomechanical analysis.

Sincerely, Everyone at every gym everywhere.